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How the Gnomes Saved Santa

This is one of the few poems you will ever see me post. I don't normally write in poetic form, but around Christmas, it seems to be one of the better forms. The story of the gnomes was inspired by my students who were working on a class project, and this is the theme.

On Christmas Eve, while we enjoy our nog
Sitting beside the fire contemplating a Yule time log
Think of Splotch and Tom of Gnome Hollow,
Those frightened yet two brave fellow
Who, upon a cold winter night,
Saved Santa with reindeer might.
Reindeer might, of course you ask,
How can a reindeer in his might bask?
Listen then, of how the gnomes saved Christmas cheer
With help from Jun the bear and Rudolph the reindeer.

‘Twas many years ago,
Long before Santa around the world would go.
In those days only a few would hear
Of sleigh bells and hooves of reindeer.
Even creatures like gnomes could receive a present,
So Splotch and Tom to the North Pole went
To ask Santa to bring presents for all,
Though in a land of elves and reindeer they were small
No one would even stop to help
Poor Splotch and Tom who were too tired to yelp.

Eventually they found a bright and cheery place
Where all who lived there could see Santa’s jolly face.
“But, wait,” Splotch said.
“Something is not quite right in my head.”
Tom, wisely, gave no answer
For all knew Splotch was no wise sir.
“What’s the matter, Splotch, dear?”
“Two yellow green eyes from Santa’s house do peer.
Certainly, Tom could see near the ivied eaves,
Two yellow-green eyes among the leaves.

Goblins! Both gnomes rattled and quaked.
Goblins were known to enjoy gnomes raked
Over fires and topped with cranberries for their parties.
Books of recipes were called Golden Gnome Teas!
Loads of gnomes said goblins’ breaths were terrible!
Inescapable were their grips, or simply indescribable!
Now, only they had eyes of glowing yellow-green
Simply for seeing in lands ruled by the Goblin queen.
Any who found themselves locked with a Goblin stead
Was counted as good as dead.
“We need to flee!” said Tom.
“Warn someone they might have a bomb!”
Splotch scratched his fuzzy head and thought.
Elves and goblins had always fought,
So maybe there was something else to consider
In this land of snow and icy glitter.
“Shouldn’t we discover what they want?”
“What do you think they’ll do – invite over their aunt?”
Splotch didn’t answer so Tom threw his arms in the air.
“They’re going to kill Santa, or I’m not Tom Sunpear.”

At that moment, the door opened and out stepped
A Goblin the size of a bear with his speech prepped.
He cleared his throat, and rubbed a large mole.
“Hear me, inhabitants of the North Pole!
We have your Santa, and demand a ransom
Of one hundred thousand gold-covered gnome.”
“One hundred thousand gnomes?” Tom squeaked.
“Impossible,” said Splotch. “Chocolate hasn’t peaked.”
“There are two!” Someone yelled.
Splotch grabbed Tom as warnings belled.

“Where to now,” Tom huffed.
“Otherwise, we’ll be taken and stuffed
With goodies and morsels the Goblins make.”
“I’ve heard they feed prisoners well before they bake,”
Splotch observed as they walked Candy Cane Lane.
Wisdom dictated no response to such a claim.
They walked until they found a place to hide,
Somewhere small and tidy, but the door they tried
Was locked and no one was home.
Who would help the two little gnomes?

“You, know,” Splotch observed, “I’ve heard of a rarity,
A red-nosed deer who even in fog gives Santa clarity.”
“A red-nosed reindeer? Are you certain it’s not a tale?
These northerners, I’ve heard are quite bold. They’ll
Tell you a joke and a farce and make you believer
Until they say “Jokes R Us – We deliver!”
“Rudolph’s the deer! I remember well
How Gramps said he was a real swell
Fellow you helped anyone in need even when
The others said he wasn’t worth negative ten.”

Gramps, it should be said, was where
Splotch inherited his incredible pair
Of ears - for something had to hold in the air
Betwixt one side of his head and the other there.
Off to Rudolph’s they did ramble,
Hoping Splotch’s idea wasn’t merely a gamble.
Inside the stable where Rudolph rested,
They found him in the back where he bested
A polar bear in five seconds flat.
“That's him!” Splotch yelled pointing to the mat.

Rudolph and the bear turned to see
Who could be speaking with such glee.
“Why, it’s two little gnomes,” said the bear, Jun.
“What has brought you to this place with this goon?”
“Rudolph is not a goon!” Tom exclaimed.
“He’s a hero who would help Santa even if maimed.”
“Now, now,” Rudolph laughed, “what is the truth?”
“Goblins napped Santa for satiate their sweet tooth.”
Splotch then explained what had happened to Santa.
At the end Rudolph and Jun could only say, “Ta-ta.”

But, they readied themselves to enter Santa’s home,
With ropes for tying and tinsel for hiding the gnomes.
“Tinsel gives off its own aura,” Jun said. “Perfect for
Hiding those who don’t want to be found by the boar.”
“What’s that?” Splotch’s curiosity queried.
“Oh, the one who runs out undesirable to be ferried
Back down to warmer climates where all others dwell
Not fit to live in our little, cold winter swell,”
Jun had explained while they finished packing all
The items they needed, placing them beside the wall.

At Santa’s home, Jun stayed low and Rudolph went high
After all, a reindeer’s favorite place is where he can fly.
Ten goblins danced around Santa and Mrs. Claus
Whose mouths they had stuffed with snow-white gauze.
The fear and terror in Mrs. Claus’ eyes was enough to
Make poor Tom quake, shake and wonder what to do.
Surely, a small gnome wasn’t enough to fight goblins!
Then he heard the Goblin Song – Goblin Boblin.
“Boblin Goblin. Goblin Boblin gobblin’ gobblin’
Eat your spud again you Boblin Goblin!”
But, Rudolph would have nothing of that,
And Jun took a stance like on the mat.
He grunted and rolled his shoulders before
He ran full-steam into the door.
The mighty crash sent the goblins running away
Only to find the hooves of a reindeer making them stay.
“Who are you?” Demanded the leader in front.
“No one could have done this.” He laughed. “We want
Fifty thousand gnomes for each of you.”
“Not happening,” Jun said. “You’ll be goblin glue.”

Splotch and Tom led Santa and Mrs. Clause through
The house to a safe place while Rudolph and Jun, true
To their words sent the Goblins away from the Pole.
“Glue?” Santa asked. “I thought it wasn’t your role
To turn goblins into glue despite my thanks.”
Rudolph shrugged, “Christmas Eve has few fog banks
So Jun and I thought it best to practice, just in case,
Something happened and he had to chase
Someone through the city in order to protect
All those who lived here while others slept.”

Jun placed a paw on each gnome head.
“These two little gnomes were not content to hide in bed
While you and the Mrs. were in danger, Sir.
They came and found the one fly over the fir
And told us about what had happened to you.”
Santa smiled. “Imagine my surprise to meet two
Brave gnomes. But what has brought you here?”
“We want to ask you to bring presents to any who fear
The dark, Sir,” Tom said. To spread your Christmas light
Around the world to make it bright.”

And this is how every Christmas Eve, Santa goes
Around the world, delivering dolls and toys
To every man, woman and child.
To the strong and the mild.
He may wear a different outfit on Christmas night,
But, sure as the sun, he will be there all right.
So, rest your head and quiet your thoughts
As you think of all the items you have bought.
How will Santa show up in your home?
Will it be with the help of two small gnomes?


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